Anonymous Survivor Story
I was 4 yrs old; that was when the abuse started. My adopted mother would beat me on a regular basis. One instance of her trying to end my life was leaving me in a burning home. I was feet away from the fire, the rest of my the family left the home & left me there while the fire grew around me. Eventually, my adopted sister came back & pulled me out of the chair I was sitting in (I remember being in some sort of chair I couldn’t easily get out on my own).
My older adopted brother, who was 4 years older than me, started molesting me on a regular basis. He, of course, threatened me that if I told anyone, he would hurt me, etc. He would not only molest me on a regular basis but also beat me as well.
Within a year or so, my adopted older sister, who was about 8 yrs older than me, started molesting me as well. At one point we moved into a home where the 3 of us had to share a room because the rest of house was unlivable. So almost nightly they would jointly molest me.
The abuse by my adopted sister ended when she graduated HS, the abuse at the hands of my adopted brother & mother continued until I was 14. I finally got out the last time my adopted mother threw me out in the middle of winter with nothing more than the clothes on my back.
I finally told a nurse who wouldn’t stop asking questions. I was staying with a friend during that time. My adopted mother didn’t seem to care that we were actively under the eye of CPS to stop her.
The last time she abused me, she hit me so hard that she knocked me from one end of a hall, down a flight of stairs and I hit the oven that was in the kitchen. This left me with 1 side of my face black & blue. CPS pulled me out & forced my adopted parents to surrender all rights (or face charges, I believe).
Reflection
The #1 change that needs to be made is the statute of limitations. I blocked out all memories after being removed. By the time I remembered, the statute of limitations ran out.
What helped me is speaking out; I am a firm believer that the more you speak out, the more you remove the shame & the power the abuser has over you. Most abusers know survivors will not speak out due to society’s shame. However, I don’t believe survivors should be the ones to live with shame, the abusers should.
The abusers believe they will never have to face any consequences because survivors will not speak out.
I am also a firm believer in living by the following: ONCE YOU GET OUT, YOU’RE NO LONGER A VICTIM, YOU’RE A SURVIVOR, DON’T CALL YOURSELF A VICTIM, YOU’RE GIVING YOUR ABUSER(S) POWER.
Take back that power, take that away from your abusers.
Also, to the therapist, NEVER USE THE FOLLOWING PHRASE TO ANY ABUSE SURVIVOR: (unless you have actually survived what they have) “I understand your pain/feelings”
This is why I refuse therapy
Anonymous / TikTok: @twisted.gen.x